Monday, 24 August 2015

Writting portfolio sample

Description: this term in writing I have been learning about ideas with Rebecca. My goal in ideas is stick to the main points.

We had to make a story about this photo

Big idea:before we started writing we made a mountain plan to plan the  beginning problem and a resolution. We have to give the readers a clue. 

Here is my planning 

Here is my writing 

As I heard the fart of the big fat cat coming. My friend just got killed so I sneaked to get the meat WAWAWAWA I'm sorry sorry lets get back to the story. So I carried the cage over with  a squeeze through the door way. Here he come finally it's not my e getting bulled it's you Loser!! I have finally caught you. See Ya I'm gonna get some lunch.

 When I was gone little mrs whiskers helped mr whiskers out of the cage but how my keys are in my feathers? Wait know there not AHH I must of dropped them Damn I thought I had him there. Hey bungee it your turn now... 
Hey hey mr whiskers why didn't the toilet paper cross the road ? Why, Because it got stuck in a crack.Hahahahahahahahahahahna hey wanna be friends with me? Sure your funny. Wanna get some lunch asked the bungee mr whiskers said no thanks. Ok see you in 20 minutes ok see you soon. 

So mr whiskers didn't really like bungee he was just acting. So the cage was all set up. 20 minutes later. Bang crash ha got you this time nah jokes wanna come out? Yes please ...

Feedback/feedford: I didn't really get the picture but great use of words and good ideas#jacobw

Evaluation: I think I did well on making it mysterious and funny. But could of made it more descriptive.

1 comment:

  1. Eli, you used great humour and added some great twists in your story that you told me about in class. If you add speech marks when your characters are talking, and start new paragraphs for new speech your reader will be able to follow your story better. I think you have done a great job of sticking to the main points and not using more words than you need. I agree that adding some descriptive words would help to add impact to your writing.